Tag Archives: hope

Bright, Sunshiney Day!


The weather here the past few days has been gorgeous, and I am slowly beginning to feel better.  I am going to focus on the strong moments and less on the weakness and fatigue as I move forward.

Good weather really affects my mood and attitude.  Does anyone else experience this?  Today is warm and sunny with temps getting into the 70’s tomorrow and Monday.  This type of weather makes me feel uplifted and hopeful.  I love the sun shining on my face and the feeling of warmth that radiates through my body. I love hearing the birds sing and seeing all the migratory breeds return to my bird feeder. I love the blossoms on my Cleveland Pear tree and Japanese cherry tree;  the pink blossoms on my heather bushes, and the heady scent of the purple hyacinth.  Next will be my ultimate favorite: The Lilac bushes. I have a huge purple lilac that grows on the side of my front porch.  I can sit there and breathe in the aroma while reading or just relaxing for hours.  Lilac is my favorite scent of all the spring flowers.  It evokes memories of my childhood that make me smile.  Growing up we had a large bush that had a cave under the branches where my sister and I would play.  My mom would cut flowers and we would give them to our teachers, and she would bring them inside and fill vases with them so we could enjoy the short lived season the most.

Spring’s newness is always filled with hope and promise.  Trees and plants that were dead for the past 6 months, resurrect to become beautiful living things.  We can learn from the seasons and celebrate our lives as the gifts they truly are.  I have learned much the past 5 and a half years and the most important thing is how precious each day is.  Live everyday as if it were your last.  I mean it.  Tell the people you love that you love them.  Smile at strangers; you may be the best part of their day and it cost you nothing. Notice the little things like the clouds, or how the sun reflects off something. Most importantly, thank God for all the good in your life. Laugh everyday.  Hug someone everyday. Eat your favorite sweet every week ( I’d say everyday if it’s a small piece of candy but if it’s cheesecake you’ll be in trouble!).

In conclusion, just get out there, take a deep breath and feel the sunshine on your face and smile. Life doesn’t get much better than that. XO


New Year, New Hopes


It seems that for the past 5 years I am glad to see the old year exit and have hope for the new one.  Once again I find myself in this same position, and I’m starting to find it all rather comical.  If I don’t laugh, I may never stop crying and that’s not how I want to live my life.  So 2015 began with a lot of hope, but after the cancer spread to my brain, my implant rupturing, and some family issues, I am looking forward to 2016 to be better.

I look at it this way, I’ve already had the worst things happen to me, so things can only go up from here right?  I have hope because without it I let the Cancer win, and that’s not going to happen.  Even if it does claim my life one day, it will have lost because I have lived longer than the statistics said I would already.  I have hope because there are new treatments on the horizon, and a cure not far away. One of these may put me into a long term remission and I could live to 70.  I have hope because my daughters refuse to allow me to die.  It’s not an option, and when I am feeling down, they pick me up to go on fighting.  Finally, I have hope because my husband cannot do what I do for the girls and so I will just have to stick around!

Hope allows us to overcome the rough spots and bumps on our journey through life.  Without hope, there is only desolation, depression, and fear. People need to hope so they can dream of a better future, and stay positive.  Even in the most dire of situations, there is always hope.  It’s how our brain figures out our next move to resolve the problem.

So for 2016, I have hope for several things I would like to share with you.  First, I hope there is a clinical trial or new therapy that can put my cancer into a long term remission.  Second, I hope this blog continues to grow, and that its words can hep others going through cancer, or find a new book, or share my passion for writing.  Third, I hope to complete the book I am writing and have it edited and ready to find a publisher by the end of the year.  Lastly, I hope to do some traveling since I have basically gone nowhere!

I hope that all of you enter into the new year with hope.  May you all have love, happiness, good health, and people to share your joy with.  Thank you for being a bright spot in my life.

Why Books Give me Hope


When I started this blog and was thinking of a name, I wanted something that would be able to encompass the three things I wanted to blog about, writing, books and cancer.  I also wanted the title to have some meaning.

Throughout my 5 year journey with breast cancer, there have been many times I have been so fatigued and exhausted from various treatments, that the only thing I could do was read.  Reading didn’t require physical exertion, and it helped take my mind off of my pain, nausea, fear, and worries.  Reading became a symbol of hope to me.  I was able to read about people beating worse diseases than I had, and living a better life than they had before.  I could visit times and places where cancer didn’t exist.  I could read about new treatments on the horizon for metastatic breast cancer which gave me hope.  Most of all, I could read for fun.  That was the only fun I could have at the time and I was so thankful that I loved it so much.

Books became my caregivers when I was alone in Philly having radiation for two weeks and couldn’t see my kids.  My books kept me from sinking into depression when I felt alone.  Old favorites like the Harry Potter Series were reread when I was at my worst because they were so familiar to me, I didn’t need to focus on them.  On days I felt strong, I would tackle a heftier subject matter.  Whatever it was, it provided me with a distraction during the bad times and made me smile and appreciate what I had when times were better.

Living with Cancer isn’t fun, but I can think of hundreds of worse things to have to deal with in life.  I never regretted getting cancer, and I still don’t.  I regret how aggressive it is, sure, but I wouldn’t change things.  Cancer has made me stronger, it has made me realize what is truly important in my life, and it has been a constant reminder of how short life is and why we shouldn’t take things for granted. I am a better person, a better mother, and a better wife thanks to cancer.  As long as I have my books around me, I will be ok.


Merry Christmas!